knowing.

one day, i vented to the LORD and complained of a situation in which i gave and gave, and got nothing in return - He smiled with such gentleness, and told me, "now you know how I feel."

and then i saw that i had not been giving Him my everything.
but He is a gracious God, and He still gives and gives, whether or not i give Him anything in return. it convicts and moves me, to love Him, not out of guilt, but out of desire.


never have we been promised:
"love and you will be loved"
"love and you shall receive"
"love and you will be happy"
"love and you shall be satisfied,"

it will be a while, but soon enough, we'll realize in the core of our souls, that love never promises anything except that we will feel. for as often as we love, so often we hurt. and as often as we give, so often we lose. but even amidst loss and sacrifice and pain, we love because we choose, we love because we are compelled. and as often as we are compelled, so often we know joy. and as often as we purpose, so often we have peace.

but most of all, as often as we encounter Love, so often we encounter God.
and as often as we encounter God, so often we feel loved.



xo


reading: a lot of RSS feeds.
listening: "I Have to Believe," Rita Springer (except for "Those Were the Days." for some reason i always skip it)
watching: "Don't Eat the Daisies"