longings

hope deferred makes the heart sick.
it's easy to remember that, because it's easily identifiable.
we all know what it feels like to have a heart in pain.

Jesus, there are so many longings of my heart, and I'm only asking for one of them to be fulfilled - I don't care which one - I just need a tree of life right now... I just need my heart restored.



--
currently listening: rachel culver, "so faithful, so kind."  this song has been on my heart in the same breath with "if you want me to."

chords and lyrics found here.

the struggle

I may not know the extent of anyone's struggle, but I do understand "the struggle."

And I am suddenly reminded of Jacob wrestling with God.

Wrestling in the cold, dark hours of the night,  

Wrestling against One, Who's face he could not see,

Wrestling tirelessly, only to have his hip dislocated, likely in severe pain,

And yet he wrestled on.  He wrestled til the dawn.  

Beloved, your struggle may be long, miserable, and sore; maybe it is already daybreak for you, and now the issue is the limp from a 'dislocated hip.'  Whatever the struggle, let your grief keep you in prayer. Mourn if you must, be emotional if you must, but let every overwhelming burst in your soul take you to the throne of grace.  There is nowhere lonelier than apart from His presence - if you must weep, weep at His feet.  If you must question, ask Him.  If you must wrestle, wrestle with God.  Jacob fought not only with physical strength, but he fought in his heart.  And at the end, still demanded of this Man: Bless me!  O, that throughout our struggle, we would still demand, "Show me Your face!  Teach me Your ways!  Save my tears!  Strengthen my heart!  Help my unbelief!"

Mourning always comes.  Morning always comes.  And blessed is the one who is faithful to the end!

At the end of the tiresome conflict, Jacob was newly identified; no longer would he be Jacob, "The Deceiver."

Then the man said, "Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with men and have overcome."
- Genesis 32:28

Ah! The promise that Jesus Christ Himself gave!

In this world, you will have trouble.  But TAKE HEART! I have overcome the world!
- John 16:33

I remember the prayer of Jabez, who was named because he was borne in pain:

Jabez called upon the God of ISRAEL, saying, “Oh that You would bless me and enlarge my border, and that your hand might be with me, and that you would keep me from harm so that it might not bring me pain!” And God granted what he asked.
- I Chronicles 4:10

The struggle may be aching, it may be confusing, it may be lonely; the words and promises of man are brittle.  But CHRIST is constant; He is a rock, He is unchanging, His promises to "never leave" are as true today as they were yesterday.

He understands the struggle.  He knows the hurt.  Therefore, He knows how best to love us.
Compassion = "to suffer with."

In the days of His flesh, Jesus offered up prayers and supplications, with loud cries and tears, to Him Who was able to save Him from death, and He was heard because of His reverence.
- Hebrews 5:7

He will swallow up death forever. The Sovereign LORD will wipe away the tears from all faces; He will remove his people’s disgrace from all the earth. The LORD has spoken.  In that day they will say, “Surely this is our God; we trusted in him, and he saved us. This is the LORD, we trusted in Him; let us rejoice and be glad in his salvation.”
- Isaiah 25:8-9

Endure the struggle, Beloved.
Stay in the presence of God.
Weep if you must.

And wait on the LORD.
Be strong, take heart,
And wait on the LORD. (ps 27.14)




xo



--
many hearts for whom this was written.  but also, much love and prayers of peace and comfort for the family of DM - he rests in the arms of God..

small blog update

i decided to give the blog a facelift.  it was about time, and it definitely needed to look a lot brighter than it has.  i'm (obviously) still parked at yournewsister.blogspot.com, though the "title" changed from "His Love goes above and beyond" to "and Love never fails."  quite honestly, both titles were aesthetic choices that still summed nicely.  also, ever wonder where my url name came from?  Read about it here!

since you're already reading, here is a verse (and song) that was stuck in my head all morning:

Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
- Lamentations 3:22-23

xo

if you want me to

This is a classic favorite of mine, and through the past few difficult weeks, it has carried my heart into arms of hope.  Music in itself is powerful, but when coupled with honest lyrics has the capability of healing - this song has gripped me, wounded my flesh, and soothed my spirit.  I trust You, Jesus. You have never once left my heart alone.

*




If You Want Me To
by Ginny Owens

The pathway is broken and the signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to

No I'm not who I was when I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
So if all of these trials bring me closer to You
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When You lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'll never go alone

So when the whole world turns against me and I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through
And I will walk through the darkness
If You want me to

Cause when I cross over Jordan, I'm gonna sing, gonna shout
Gonna look into your eyes and see you never let me down
So take me on the pathway that leads me home to You
And I will walk through the valley
If You want me to



xo